Friday, January 9, 2009

How To Win Friends And Influence People

Six ways to make people like you...
  • Become genuinely interested in other people.
  • Smile.
  • Remember that the person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
  • Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  • Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
  • Make the other person feel important.
Twelve ways of winning people to your thinking...
  • The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
  • Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong".
  • If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  • Begin in a friendly way.
  • Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
  • Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
  • Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
  • Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
  • Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
  • Appeal to the nobler motives.
  • Dramatize your ideas.
  • Throw down a challenge.
Nine ways to change people without giving offense and arousing resentment...
  • Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
  • Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
  • Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  • Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  • Let the other person save face.
  • Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise".
  • Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  • Use encouragement. Make fault seem easy to correct.
  • Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
Reference: How to win friends and influence people - Dale Carnegie

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

How To Master Tricky Interview Questions?

A job applicant is typically interviewed by at least 2 or more people. These interviewers have different background and different skill sets. In order for a candidate to get the coveted job offer, s/he must impress most, if not all, of the interviewers. Having a complete command over your area of expertise will get an applicant 90% close to the goal of landing the job. However, the other 10% is dependent on the other “softer” side of the candidate that is explored during the interview. Typically, the higher-up the interviewer asking the question in the food chain of the company (read, his feedback about you is extremely important), the more s/he will ask these behavioral questions.

We have assembled below answers to some of the questions faced by most job seekers. By no means, they replace your knowledge and hence your confidence in your own field. These questions are in addition to queries specific about your skill sets and your background.

1. Tell us about yourself.

Usually an initial question, an ice-breaker. I have typically asked this question for different reasons. One, I did not get a chance to review the candidate’s CV beforehand and this will give me time to peruse through his CV while he is talking about himself. Another reason is because I want to hear the interviewee talk to ascertain how good of a communicator he is. A concise 2-minute answer to this question that hits all the main points of the candidate will impress upon me that the person can think analytically and is a good communicator. Generally speaking, this question maybe asked more from those candidates seeking non-technical jobs, or those seeking higher positions.

2. What do you know about our organization/company?

A question asked typically toward the end of the interview. This should clue you that the interview is about to come to an end. You don’t have to spend hours researching each company that calls you for an interview but you should at least visit their web site and get a basic understanding of their product offering and/or the services they offer. This will leave a very good impression upon the interviewer that you are genuinely interested in his organization. Remember, the interviewer has already made his decision to work for the company that he is interviewing candidates for. The few candidates who can walk in and tell him that they care enough to learn about his company will endear those candidates to the interviewer.

3. Why should we hire you?

This is typically asked to get right to the point. What do you bring to the table that other candidates do not? Why are you better than other candidates that came before you and ones that are going to come after you? Nailing this question will greatly enhance your chances of getting the offer. Think about what is being asked for a moment. You must link your abilities to the job duties. That is, you must establish that you have the qualities that will meet all the job requirements.

Impress the interviewer. Tell them about your achieved targets. Cite specifics from your resume or list of career accomplishments. Establish that your skills and interests & a result oriented history make you a valuable candidate. Mention your aptitude to set priorities, categorize problems and your experience and vigor to resolve them.
A 3-5 minute answer is something that the interviewer is typically looking for. Anything under either means that you don’t have enough capabilities or that you cannot express yourself; either is bad. And anything longer means that you are rambling and are going to lose the interviewer’s attention.

4. What do you find most/least attractive about this position?

To answer this question, you should have studied the job requirements and its duties. Mention anywhere up to four or five features of the job that fit well with your background or with your future plans. For example, if the position is for a PHP Web Developer, you can say that it attracted you because you have already some experience in this technology and you want to further enhance your skills as Web Development is an area where you want to build your career.

Be careful about the unattractive part. Again, you do not want to unnecessarily offend the interviewer. You can jokingly say that there is nothing unattractive, which is a reason why you are so interested in this job.

5. Why do you want to work for us?

A good answer comes from good homework to articulate a prompt reply in terms of company’s requirement. You can say that according to your research the company is working on projects that greatly interest you. For example, if the organization is known for quality management, your answer should mention that fact and show that you would like to be a part of the team that does quality testing. If the company places a great deal of emphasis on building products emphasize the fact that you want to create new things and that this company is a great place for such activity. Basically, your answer should be a combination of what the company does and what you want to do, or what you are good at doing.

6. What do you look for in a job?

Focus your answer to the opportunities available at the company you are interviewed for. Tell them about your yearning to perform and be acknowledged for your contributions. Emphasize on opportunity rather than personal security. That is, tell them that you value opportunities for growth where you will learn new concepts. Typically, we should all look for those job opportunities that would enhance our existing skills and get us to the next rung in the corporate ladder. Money and job security is important but something that should not be overly emphasized. Your research on the company should already tell you how secure the company is before going there for an interview. Like the companies who only call candidates that best match their criteria, so should you only call upon the companies that best match your minimum criteria of places you’re where you will spend more than 8 hours every day?

7. How long will you stay with us?

Establish that you are interested in a strong and long career with the organization, but you would have to continue to feel challenged to remain with any organization. At no point should the interviewer feel that you are a job-hopper. This type of question is typically asked of those candidates that have switched multiple jobs too quickly. The interviewer wants to ascertain that you will stay with them for a long time. Your answer should put them at ease.

8. What if you are subjected to long periods of silence or your appearance is criticized?

Stress interview is a technique to check the candidate’s patience level. In such interviews a candidate is made to wait before the interview and, in some cases, in the presence of the interviewers who apparently does not give any attention towards the candidate sitting their room. This is not something typical and is mostly limited to certain types of industries or job types such as Hospitality industry or Sales positions. This is a technique used to see how the particular candidate will react under stress or specific conditions related to the job nature. You need to be very patient during such interviews. Keep smiling and do not show that you are bored or irritated or angry. You can break the silence by politely asking the interviewer if there is anything that you can elaborate upon or anything else that you can answer. Remind yourself of the goal ahead i.e. getting the job.

9. What are your interests outside of work?

Tell them about your one or two favorite past times keeping in mind the job nature. This is more of a filler question where interviewer just wants to know what kind of a person you are or he is asking you this question while reading more details in your CV, or he is simply finished with his questions but wants another parting shot before he calls off the interview. Your answer should supplement the job nature. If it is a sales position, maybe you can say that I like to meet people outside of work. If you are applying for a Customer Support position, you can say that I like to read to help me in my communications skills (be sure to know what you read in case the interviewer probes you further).

10. What is your salary expectation?

Salary is a delicate topic. Don’t sell yourself short, but continue to stress the fact that the job itself is the most important thing in your mind. The interviewer may be trying to determine just how much you want the job. Don’t leave the impression that money is the only thing that is important to you. Link questions of salary to the work itself.

But whenever possible, say as little as you can about salary until you reach the “final” stage of the interview process. At that point, you know that the company is genuinely interested in you and that it is likely to be flexible in salary negotiations.

11. Your resume suggests you are over-qualified/more experienced for this position. What’s your opinion?

A question like this is categorized as a behavioral question. Such a question is generally asked to get an idea about your knowledge about the position you have applied for. That is, if you know for sure what the position is and do you know about its market value. It is also sometimes asked to throw you off-balance and to see how you react. Shrewd interviewers employ such techniques to better understand a candidate’s personality, to judge your general reaction and attitude as a qualified professional.
To answer such a question you must focus and talk about your skill set and professional background to-date and balance it with the job requirements without going into the murky details of formulating a personal opinion about being over-qualified; simply state the facts. Emphasize your interest in establishing a long-term association with the organization and make a point that powerful companies always have tough teams & experienced executives who always keep them on the top. Since you are a qualified professional so you have every faith that the company will get a fast return on its investment by hiring you. You can say that, "A growing, dynamic company can never have too much talent." Exude confidence but do not let the interviewer feel that you are over confident.

12. What are your strengths and weaknesses?

Although this question may seem as though you should answer with a positive answer for your strengths and a negative for your weaknesses, try to give two positive answers. When discussing your strengths highlight strengths that specifically apply to the available post. When indicating your weaknesses never detail a character defect rather try to explain where you identified a problem area where you were able to remedy it and explain how you did so.

13. Why are you leaving (did you leave) your present (last) job?

Again the employer, by asking such a question, wants to know if you are a dedicated, goal oriented person who is serious about a career with his company. Do not give a long-winded answer. Try to keep it very brief and to the point and as honest as you can without hurting yourself. For example if you were laid off in an across-the-board cutback, say so; otherwise, indicate that the move was your decision and the result of your action. Avoid mentioning personality conflicts. Under no circumstances talk ill about your previous employer as the person interviewing you will take an impression that you might talk about your new boss in the same context if you two ever go on wrong ends. The interviewer may spend some time probing you on this issue, particularly if it is clear that you were terminated. The "We agreed to disagree" approach may be useful. Remember that your references are likely to be checked, so don’t fabricate a story for an interview.

14. In your current (last) position, what features do (did) you like the most/least?

Similarly, as mentioned before, you should be very careful and positive while answering this question. You will not want your future boss to jump to a wrong conclusion that you are a difficult employee who likes picking out flaws in the company. A negative image at any stage of the interview can prove fatal so be very focused and positive about every word that comes out of your mouth. If you make your last job sound terrible, an interviewer may wonder why you remained there until now. Pick not more than one thing that would be considered a bad practice professionally everywhere. In this regards, the interviewer will not be able to argue with you. If you can back up with anything you did to improve the practice, it will be considered a plus.

15. How successful do you think you’ve been so far?

Confidence is the key to answer this question while over confidence can create a problem here. This question is actually asked to see if you exude over confidence while answering or you give a humble answer while knowing perfectly well about your success rate during your professional career. Although the type of job being interviewed for may dictate the amount of chutzpah you want to display here but a general rule of thumb is to stay safe with a more low-key, just-the-facts type of an answer. You can say that, all-in-all you are happy with the way your career has progressed so far. List your key achievements and what was their impact to your employer(s).

16. Where do you see yourself five years from now?

This question is asked to see if you are a career oriented person & how seriously you have thought about your career. More importantly, it is used to gauge if the company can offer you a growth path that is in line with your aspirations. The employer also wants to see if you have that vigor and energy that the company requires for a team leader or simply a team member. Remember that a focused and target oriented employee is always an attraction for the employer. So here it is for you to establish that you are very particular about your goals in future. You can tell the interviewer that you would like to grow with the company and you will make sure that your every effort is directed towards becoming a successful and reliable part of the company.

Following are some questions asked from individuals being interviewed for managerial positions:

A. What do you look for when you hire people?

This question is asked to see that if you are given the task to hire people for your team in future, will you be clear as to who you want on your team for the specific job completions. In short what kind of a team maker are you? This is again a question to gauge your decision making power. A safe answer is that you will prefer people with good skills, initiative and adaptability to be able to work comfortably and effectively with others and those who appear capable of moving up in the organization. Start with a more generic answer and end with a comment to the interviewer that hiring criteria varies from one job to another and you will change what you look for in an employee based on the job description.

B. Have you ever fired any staff? How did you handle the situation?

Firing of staff is not an easy situation to deal with and it needs a proper procedure to follow. For those of you who have been on managerial positions know that such tasks are pretty nasty. Generally such a situation is not much discussed. But if you are asked this question admit that the situation was not easy, but it worked out fine for the company and, you think, for the individual as well. You can say that you don’t enjoy unpleasant tasks but you can resolve them efficiently and -in the case of firing someone- humanely.

C. What do you think is the most difficult thing about being a manager/ executive?

Being a manager is a position of responsibility. Companies rely on these people for their facing challenges, smooth working and successful target achievements. So the interviewer wants to see how a committed manager they can find in you. You can start by saying that nothing particularly is too difficult but each task brings with itself a set of its own challenges and a good manager learns from each task. Some of the more challenging tasks have been working with difficult employees (be ready for a follow-up question as to how you dealt with them), motivating employees to work under tight deadlines, and working with difficult clients.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Instructions For Life

  • Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
  • Memorize your favorite poem.
  • Don't believe all you hear.
  • Don't spend all you have.
  • Don't sleep all you want.
  • When you say, "I love you", mean it.
  • When you say, "I'm sorry", look the person in the eye.
  • Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
  • Believe in love at first sight.
  • Never laugh at anyone's dreams.
  • Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
  • In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
  • Don't judge people by their relatives.
  • Talk slowly, but think quick.
  • When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?".
  • Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
  • Call your parents.
  • Say "God bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
  • When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
  • Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.
  • Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
  • When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
  • Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
  • Marry a spouse you love to talk to. As you get older, his or her conversational skills will be as important as any other.
  • Spend some time alone.
  • Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
  • Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
  • Read more books and watch less TV.
  • Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll get to enjoy it a second time.
  • Trust in God but lock your car.
  • A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.
  • In disagreements with loved ones, deal with a current situation.
  • Don't bring up the past.
  • Read between the lines.
  • Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
  • Be gentle with the earth.
  • Pray. There's immeasurable power in it.
  • Never interrupt when you are being flattered.
  • Mind your own business.
  • Don't trust a person who doesn't close his or her eyes when you kiss them.
  • Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
  • If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth's greatest satisfaction.
  • Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.
  • Learn the rules, then break some.
  • Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.
  • Judge your success by what you had to give up, achieving it.
  • Remember that your character is your destiny.

10 Easy Ways to Build Self Confidence

Mr. Awais Khan (HR Manager)
The Avari, Lahore.

10 Easy Ways to Build Self Confidence

Self confidence is the most imperative thing any individual requires either at the start of his professional career or through his pursuit to nurture it. Do you feel your mind clouded with questions like, How do I look like to other people? What others think about me? People and their perceptions are the realities that every human faces every day and every minute of his/her life.

Self confidence is the difference between feeling inexorable and feeling anxious about your intellect. Sometimes we observe that wonderfully gifted personals have not harnessed the best out of them because of their internal fears. Remember, your own perception about yourself reflects how others perceive you. Perception is like veracity — the more self confident you are, the more are chances of your success.

Even though many aspects regarding self confidence are out of your control, but you can consciously adopt a number of things to build self confidence. Use the following 10 strategies to get the mental edge you need to reach your prospective.

1. Dress Sharp

A dress affects the way a person feels about himself. For example the morning you know you don’t look good the feeling reflects in the way you carry yourself around all day. This also affects your interaction with other people. So be conscious about yourself and take care of your personal appearance to build up a good confidence level. Significant improvements can be made by following some simple routine:

  • Bath and shave frequently
  • Wear clean clothes
  • Be cognizant of latest styles
  • A great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much“. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes buy half as many. Select high quality items. This will decrease your spending because expensive clothes have good quality so they take time to wear out and stay in style longer.

2. Walk Fast

A way to tell how a person feels about him/ herself is to observe his/her walk. Is it slow & tired? Or is it brisk and firm? People with confidence walk brisk so adopt this habit. Walking faster will make to you look and feel more important. This will keep you more alert physically and will double the energy level. Even if you are not in a hurry for a meeting or to catch a flight, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step.

3. Good Posture

The way a person carries him/herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lazy movements display a lack of interest and self confidence. They give the impression of being less enthusiastic and dull which in turn implies that they do not care about what is happening around and in their lives. This is a feeling of negativity they carry around with themselves. By practicing good posture, you will automatically feel confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You will make a positive impression on others and will feel more alert and empowered.

4. Personal Motivation

One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Write a 30-60 second speech which highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud or inside your head for a confidence boost.

5. Gratitude

Your mind is like a machine which is needed to be controlled by you. When you focus too much on what you want your mind creates reasons why you cannot have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. Consciously focus on gratitude for what you are. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Do not let negativity invade your mind for long as it cannot be avoided but can be controlled. Count your successes, exclusive abilities, good relationships, and positive momentum. You will be amazed how much this simple practice will bring you closer to success.

6. Compliment other people

It is observed that a negative person often transfers his/her negative feelings to others either by insult or gossip. If you feel you have this streak in you STOP! break this cycle of pessimism & get into the habit of praising people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. This will make you acceptable and well liked among your peers and colleagues which will build your self confidence. As by looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

7. Sit in the front row

Around the world we see people striving to seat themselves at the back rows may it be schools, offices or public assemblies. Most people prefer the back seat because they are afraid of being noticed. This reflects lack of self confidence. Sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You will also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.

8. Speak up

During group discussions many people never speak up because they are afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear is not really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion you will become a better public speaker. You will instill more confidence in your thoughts and will be recognized as a leader by your peers.

9. Work out

Physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you are out of shape you will feel insecure, unattractive and less energetic. Start working out, this will improve your physical appearance; make you feel fresh, boat your energy and accomplish something positive. Working out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum upon which you can build the rest of your day.

10. Focus on contribution

Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus more on ourselves and neglect the needs of other people. Concentrate on contributing to the rest of the world you will worry less about you own flaws. You can start with a small charity. This will increase your self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency. The more you contribute to the world the more you will be rewarded with personal success and recognition.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Motivational Videos

Randy Pausch - Achieving Your Childhood Dreams



Steve Jobs - 2005 Stanford Commencement Address



One Can Do Anything With Belief - Clip From The Movie 'Facing The Giants'

Words of Wisdom

Dale Carnegie
  1. Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.
  2. Do the hard jobs first. The easy jobs will take care of themselves.
  3. Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours.
  4. Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it... that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear.
  5. Fear doesn't exist anywhere except in the mind.
  6. Fear not those who argue but those who dodge.
  7. Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have.
  8. First ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen? Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst.
  9. Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.
  10. If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done.
  11. If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive.
  12. Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.
  13. Most of us have far more courage than we ever dreamed possible.
  14. One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.
  15. People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.
  16. Remember happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have; it depends solely on what you think.
  17. The essence of all art is to have pleasure in giving pleasure.
  18. There are four ways, and only four ways, in which we have contact with the world. We are evaluated and classified by these four contacts: what we do, how we look, what we say, and how we say it.
  19. There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person want to do it.
  20. When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

  1. A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
  2. A great man is always willing to be little.
  3. A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer.
  4. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.
  5. Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
  6. Do the thing we fear, and death of fear is certain.
  7. For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.
  8. He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.
  9. Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
  10. Make yourself necessary to somebody.
  11. Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.
  12. Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.
  13. People only see what they are prepared to see.
  14. The man of genius inspires us with a boundless confidence in our own powers.
  15. The sum of wisdom is that time is never lost that is devoted to work.
  16. To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
  17. Win as if you were used to it, lose as if you enjoyed it for a change.
  18. None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone.
  19. That which we persist in doing becomes easier, not that the task itself has become easier, but that our ability to perform it has improved.
  20. Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Love

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. -- Robert Frost

Yep, that is what love is, a desire to be desired. A wish to be wished. Love is a great realization to be realized. A feeling to be understood. An emotion to be sensed or flood of emotions to be felt. Love is not unreal, it is a real entity. Love is all around us, even mere smiling at someone is a gesture of love.

Can we control our emotions? Can we control our feelings? The answer might be may be. But for me it is a solid no!

We cannot control our emotions. It is like law of conservation of energy. Energy can neither be created nor destroyed. Love is not created, it just exists. Energy transfers from one form to another. Love, if we try to hide it, will transfer itself into other feelings. Now what other feelings... May be it comes out as a deep cry or an unbearable pain more likely an extreme hurt feeling!

But why do we fall in love? We fall in love because we want to. We want to fall in love because we need to. We need to fall in love because we just cannot live without it. Love is as important as water is to life.

We do not need to explicitly fall in love. It just happens. Love is a natural phenomena, you do not have to do anything to fall in love. When we find that person, to whom we are meant to fall in love, we develop a beautiful chemistry with that person. It is all natural. We start feeling good. Everything starts to seem pleasant. Our brain starts generating such signals that it dawns upon us that this person is the right person for us. The person whom we want to spend our life with!